How to Not Lose Yourself in a Corporate Job
Staying true to yourself in your career is an uphill battle. Most of us wear a “professional mask” at work we act completely different than our true selves, in some ways it makes sense, your bar self won’t be the same as your work self. But who you are to your core, maybe you enjoy making people laugh, maybe you are curious and love to ask questions, or maybe you love to dive deep into the data to understand how things work or can be improved.
Who you are comes with many facets; everyone is different and brings value in their own ways, but we find ourselves in a career that wasn’t necessarily planned. Some fall into a job and keep on that path, slowly dimming those amazing parts of ourselves to fit the mold needed for the role we are asked to perform. Performance is the operative word. The corporate world is a performance, and you must stay on script.
Now that it isn’t always true, there are times when we find the right manager or company that truly stands by what they say when they tell you to be your authentic self. “Being your authentic self” is a buzzword now; it is amazing how often you will see that on websites now, “we want you to be your authentic self” caveat, but not too authentic cause you need to stay in line. 🫠
So, how do you stay true to yourself? The first thing is knowing who you are. Do the work, meaning do some soul searching. Do you enjoy what you do? What parts do you enjoy? What parts do you hate? What do you find yourself doing in your spare time? What brings you joy? What sets your soul on fire? What annoys you? What do you care about? Do you like people? (Haha, this one is serious. Some of us are not meant to work with customers, and that is 100% okay if you are not a people person who can be OK working with strong-willed customers.) These are just some of the questions you should ask yourself to get to know yourself better. Ask yourself about these every 2-5 years or so. We evolve constantly. I am not the same woman I was when I was 25.
Once you better understand who you are, evaluate how that fits into your career today. Are you happy? Are you content? Are you feeling fulfilled some days (this won't be an everyday feeling)? Can you be yourself where you work? If not, what are you dimming down to fit in? Can you keep doing that? If you find yourself dimming a huge part of who you are, try making minor changes to regain that power. For example, if you are innately curious about how things work or have a ton of questions, start speaking up and asking a few in meetings or one-on-one. Start scratching that itch to see how you feel and how it is received. Hopefully it will be received well, if not, that is your sign to move on.
If you find yourself in a role where you are dealing with people and they happen not to be your favorite thing in the world, that is ok. You have quite a transferable background. Now, you will never eliminate dealing with people, sorry to say. However, you can pull your experience and knowledge and pivot to internal employees versus customers. Sometimes, they can be easier to work with (not always). Maybe you can work with customer data, or be a program manager that develops programs for customers, there are quite a few options to pivot to. This will take time and possibly some course/certification work, but starting on that path will provide you with direction.
Years ago, I found myself in a job where I needed to pretend to be someone different. It was working at a sales desk. I’m not good at sales, cold calling, presentations, dropping into offices unannounced, that is not my style. I forced myself to wear that mask every day until I couldn’t do it any longer. I burnt out. My body and brain decided for me that enough was enough. I ended up quitting without having anything lined up. It was a terrifying time as I was set to get married in 6 months. I had a huge support system, which gave me the luxury of having the time to figure out who I was. In that time, I learned about my strong empathy and desire to help others and be a part of their success and growth. That is what led me down the road of recruitment. Sometimes life kicks you in the ass to get you on the right track that you have been ignoring.
So, dear reader, be kind to yourself, listen to your inner voice, quiet the world around you for a moment, and listen to your body, mind, and soul. It usually knows what is best for you. Once you have your path, take one day at a time to get back to who you are. In some cases, you will thrive in the role you have been in; for some, it will open up new opportunities elsewhere for you to explore, and for others, it will thrust you into a new world entirely.
Stay grounded, value your well-being, and never sacrifice your true self for a title or position.
